to have and to hold, sort of
by graceviolets
Summary: He didn't marry her, not really, but it kind of feels like he did anyway.


He didn't marry her, not really, but it kind of feels like he did anyway.

…

Their party (that isn't really their party, just a party they crashed) is rowdy and loud and he keeps losing her in the crowd. He sees her chatting with a waiter or searching in the coat pile for someone's jacket. And then she's gone again. But she always finds him. Every ten or fifteen minutes she miraculously shows up at his side, slides her small fingers into his and whispers something in his ear.

"Come and dance."

"Nah" he sighs.

"Please" she begs with her eyes filled with joy and happiness.

And he can't say no.

"Fine" he mutters, trying to sound more moody then he is (because that's his thing).

The song is metallic and fast and people jump up and down. Grace pulls him closers and sways on the spot. Like it's some middle school party with sweaty hands and stolen kisses in the parents' bedroom. Mini crashes into them and screams something about ruining the mood, but Grace only smiles and Rich only shakes his head. They can do what they want. It's their wedding party, sort of.

"This would be more romantic if they weren't playing dubstep" he comments.

She interlocks her fingers around his neck. Her hands are hot against his skin. She presses her forehead against his.

"This is romantic enough" she mumbles.

"Like a Jane Austen novel?"

She giggles and he smiles too because he just can't help it.

"Better."

It's like a first dance at a wedding reception, but not really.

…

The band has left and Liv grabs the microphone. The original guests are either too drunk or too busy making out to care.

"I'm going to make a speech" she announces. "To Gracie."

"Oh god" Rich sighs.

"Oh god" Grace giggles.

"Gracie almost got married today" Liv goes on and Nick whistles and Alo claps his hand. "And I made wrote down some words."

She digs in her cleavage and finds, together with a small plastic bag filled with white powder, a small note.

"Grace dreamed of marrying Prince Charming, but she ended up with the Prince of Darkness."

Mini and Rich both boo that lame joke but Grace laughs and claps and he shakes her head at her.

"She forged a signature and hitchhiked and waited forever on fucking hill, but in the end she didn't go through with it."

"Great speech" Rich calls.

Liv flips him off.

"Let's toast to Gracie and Rich, and let's all fucking hope that the next time they try to get hitched, it's not in the middle of nowhere."

Grace cheers and Rich rolls his eyes and suddenly people are clinking their glasses.

"We're supposed to kiss" she whispers.

If she didn't have that look on her face, he would have refused, but he wants to make her happy so he kisses her. It's not like it's a big sacrifice on his behalf.

"Can we try again sometime?" she asks, like a kid asking for a second time on a roller coaster. "To get married."

"Sure" he smiles.

"Good."

She kisses him again and he forgets that people are staring at them. She has that effect on him.

…

He's hungry and she's tired so they decide to finally eat the cake that Franky baked. Someone has stepped on the box but they don't care. He cuts it up with a fork he finds in party tent and hands her the first piece. She swallows it whole and licks the frosting from her small fingers.

"I'm glad we didn't do it" he says and sort of means it.

"Got married?"

"Yeah."

He takes a piece of cake too. It's too sugary sweet for his taste but he eats it anyway. It's not about the taste, not really.

"Why?" she asks.

She has frosting on her cheek, he leans in and rubs it off.

"It wouldn't have been right, not really."

"Maybe not" she agrees.

They leave the rest of the cake on the lawn and abandon the party. The sugar didn't make her more awake and he just wants to be alone with her anyway.

"It would have been for the wrong reasons" he goes on.

"You don't have to defend it, Richard" she smiles and squeezes his hand.

"You didn't think it was right either, right?" he asks.

"No" she sighs. "Not really."

They walk in the direction they think is home. It's miles to walk, it might take all night. He knows it and she knows it but no one says it. Rich doesn't know about her, but he likes walking like this, with her, only her.

…

He does carry her over the threshold to his room but it's because she's half-asleep. He groans and she mumbles something about him having the arm strength of a five year old and he covers her with a blanket.

"If we had gotten married, I would have forced you to sleep with me" he drawls. "It's a tradition after all."

"Lucky we changed our minds then" she whispers.

"And you would have had to wash my clothes and do the dishes and…"

"How's that different from what I do know?" she replies, amused.

"You don't want wash my clothes!"

"Not that you know" she giggles.

"Fuck you."

Her eyes are almost closed, her eyelashes rest on her skin and her face is relaxed.

"Love you" she tells him, in some kind of version of good night.

"Good night" he tells her, in some kind of version I love you.

…

He didn't marry her, not really, but it kind of feels like he did anyway.


End file.
